What does home mean?

Hello there People of the Internet.


On August the 14th 2013 something major happened in my life. Something scary. Something I didnt know what to expect from.I said goodbye to my parents and my friends. Walked through the security with two other People that were on the same way.  Around 1pm I got on the plane and flew to New York City. New York was the start of a great beginning. Begining of a second life. We had some fantastic days there. Saturday night everyone was nervous. Because Sunday morning we would all fly in some small place somewhere in the United States. Living with strangers that hopefully become a second Family. Getting new friends. Maybe experience a very Special and complicated Love.

We would start our Exchange.

I had the wonderful opportunity to fly to Louisiana. A little town in North West Louisiana. Living there with strangers. Sadly the parents stayed pretty much strangers to me. But they had a 4/5 year old son and a 10/11 year old daughter. It is a Blessing to have them in my life. I love them like they are my real biological siblings and I will always protect them. I did got the honor and getting a second Family though. Because I did not enjoyed staying at my hostfamily alot, I spent many many many days at my friends house. We had American History together, but never really bonded till we started playing Soccer together in the School Team. It started all of with of those normal Louisiana Friday nights. Sitting at the lake, having a little fire and smores. And when we woke up the next morning, of course late for practice, we were extremly Close friends. Even the rest of their Family took me like their own child/sister. It was amazing. Her mom is such an wonderful Person that helped me through everything. Every single, little or big, Problem she would be there for me.

Now my year went by way to fast and then May the 25th came by. The day I was flying "home" to Germany. But it did not felt like going home.

I landed safe and Sound a day later in Germany. The car and my parents were pretty much the only Things familar. My mom moved in with her new boyfriend, that I barely knew. He has three sons. So I basically have three new Brothers. My cat died. For that we have a dog and two bunnys. My room was not a room. It was a squarred area full with moving boxes. This was not home. It still is not. Or is it? What does home mean? And when is something  home?

I do love it back in Germany. But I learned that I do not belong here anymore. It will always stay a home for me, but at the same time not at all. Right now I am homesick. Homesick to Louisiana. People tell me that it will go away and it is just a Phase. But I do not think it is in my case. I just do not fit here anymore. Talking german feels awkward. I really can not wait to go back home. The place I feel is home. My friends house. Louisiana.

I can not put my thoughts really in words, but that is all I will tell for today. Maybe I will throw in more about my Louisiana experience. Probably. I want to know is here anyone from Louisiana reading? If yes I love your state. Hunting. Fishing. fourwheeler. Crawfish. Jambalaya. Everything.

Talk to you soon.
Goodnight. Have a great day. Enjoy life.
Anne.